Press Play
by Camille H
Summary: Inuyasha's having some issues and Kagome leaves a surprise for him. But will he get it? Rated for innuendo and language


**Press Play**

Summary: Inuyasha's having some issues and Kagome leaves a surprise for him. But will he get it?

* * *

Unfortunately, Inuyasha turned out to not have such great stamina in bed, as he and Kagome found out the very night that they confessed their true, ever-lasting love to eacho other. It really was very romantic- perfect, you could say. However... He just couldn't _finish_,and ever since then, Kagome had been reading every book on the subject she could get her hands on. Finally, she found the perfect solution...

_Kagome took the voice recorder out of her big, yellow bag and set it in a nook of the God tree- where she thought Inuyasha was sure to find it, since they spent about seventy percent of their time there ever since they confessed their true love. _

"Hey, Ginta, c'mere!" Hakkaku yelled, waving over his brother. He was out looking for Kagome, to bring her back to Kouga, but he coudn't find her! The newest scent of hers was on that... Thing. He had no idea what the rectangular object was, but he pushed a tab- then he nearly wet his pants! A voice that sounded just like Kagome's began to come out of it. What kind of demon was this?!

_"Oh, Inuyasha... I love you so much. I wanna lick you like a lollipop-"_

Ginta and Hakkuku shrieked as Hakkaku pressed a few of the tabs again.

"What the hell?!" Ginta said, poking the contraption with a finger.

"What's a lollipop?" Hakkaku asked, scratching his head.

"Well, I think it's some kind of round candy on a stick, but how should I know? I don't even know what English is! Kouga should hear this!"

And off they raced.

* * *

"What d'ya mean this is a demon?" Kouga asked, looking at the thingamajig through narrowed eyes.

"It has Kagome's voice!" Ginta said, nodding his head fervently.

"Well, fuck... Lemme hear it!" Hakkaku nodded and pressed the button.

_"Oh, yeah... You'd like that, you naughty dog..."_

Kouga's jaw dropped and he smacked the contraption away. It hit the ground and stopped playing, bouncing until it landed near a stream.

* * *

A few hours later, Kagura was in the area, searching for Kouga and his stinky band of wolves. She had some more killin' to do. Instead, she found the tape recorder, which carried Kouga's smell. As she bent down to pick it up, she shivered, getting the distinct impression that someone was watching her. She looked around suspiciously before pressing random tabs on the machine.

_"I'm going to make you shake, worse than that time when you tried to lift off that boulder Shippou magick'd to your hands..."_

Kagura grimaced and tossed the thing away from her. It sounded like that girl, Kagome's, voice! How did the demon get _her_ voice? She turned away and took out a feather, giving one last glance into the forest, but still seeing no one. As she flew away, a small girl came out of the bushes...

* * *

"Oh! Why did that lady throw this away?" Rin said, running her hands over the plastic thingamajig. It didn't look like anything she'd ever seen and she'd certainly never felt plastic! She playing around with it for a bit, pressing some tabs. Finally, a voice came out of it...

_"When I see you next, you're so going to get it... I'm gonna make your ears so hot, you won't be able to stand it..."_

Rin recognized the voice straight-away. After all, it _was_ the woman she tried to hook Sesshoumaru up with- hey, she really _did_ need a mother figure in her life. Alas, he didn't listen. She caught him peeking at her sometimes when she bathed... She wondered if that was why he didn't listen to her urgings.

Anyway.

Rin skipped off to find Lord Fluffy with the machine in her hands, singing a simple children's song.

"Yes?" Sesshoumaru said, looking down at Rin who had been tugging at his sleeve for the past ten minutes. He tried to ignore her, but he just couldn't. She was very radiant after all, for an eleven year old.

"Listen to this! It's the voice of the mommy girl I want! That mean Kagura lady had it before I did!" Rin said, grinning as she pushed a tab.

_"Oh, god, Inuyasha... I'm muy caliente for you! I'd scream so loudly..."_

It didn't matter that Sesshoumaru didn't know any Spanish, he understood. He isn't Lord Fluffy for nothin', you know.

"Oh, my... Rin- go away!" He said, waving her away with a hand. He walked in the opposite direction she was going and listened to the tape himself...

* * *

"Hey."

"Wha-- What?!" Inuyasha spun around to find Kagome staring at him, completely nude. His mouth fell open.

"Why don't you close your mouth? I wouldn't want you to... _drool_." Kagome said, walking up to him and closing his jaw for him. "Did you like my message?"

"Er..." He didn't answer- he didn't know what message he was supposed to get. He swallowed hard, "Sure."

Kagome grinned and stroked his cheek, "Good... I'm sure it'll be _very_ fun."

Later, Kagome frowned. She was looking up at Inuyasha's face, which was in a grimace.

"I'm sorry- I'm so, so sorry!"

"I thought you got my message!"

"Um... I don't know what you're talking about."

Kagome sighed and ran a hand over her face. It was time to get some more books.

* * *

Author's Note: Heh. Thanks for reading. :) Guess Inuyasha just doesn't have what it takes.

"You're smurfing kidding!"


End file.
